FINANCIAL experts have said caring for parents is becoming an ever bigger financial planning issue and shared the “hidden cost” of looking after ageing parents, with one warning: “Many unpaid carers are holding the system together while quietly burning out”.
Caring for parents in their old age is becoming one of the biggest hidden financial and emotional pressures facing families today, as longer life expectancy and deteriorating later-life health places growing strain on their adult children, they say.
They added many people are being forced to juggle children — hence the ‘sandwich generation’ moniker — and increasingly complex caring responsibilities at the same time, often with little preparation or clear financial planning.
Financial advisers say the true cost of caring extends far beyond direct expenses, with unpaid carers frequently sacrificing income, pension contributions, career progression and their own wellbeing while trying to coordinate care on top of other responsibilities.
They advised families to have earlier conversations around long-term care, powers of attorney, finances and support planning, warning that too many important decisions are still being made too late during emergencies.
Financial and emotional costs
Brenda Gabriel, Director at Whitstable-based public relations firm, BGPR, said her income and business suffered due to her parents’ caring needs.
She added: “I think caring for ageing parents is becoming one of the biggest hidden financial and emotional crises of our generation, particularly for women juggling children, work and increasingly complex caring responsibilities.
“I went from running a successful business to effectively becoming a full-time advocate, project manager and carer for both of my parents almost overnight.
“Caring isn’t just ‘helping out’. It’s appointments, safeguarding concerns, social workers, medication, housing issues, endless emails, phone calls and chasing systems while trying to maintain some semblance of normal life. The emotional labour is enormous and so is the financial impact.
“My income and business suffered because caring consumed so much mental bandwidth. I eventually had to register as a full-time carer and apply for Universal Credit after years of trying to hold everything together. Many unpaid carers are holding the system together while quietly burning out themselves.”
Hidden costs of caring
Nouran Moustafa, Practice Principal and IFA at Roxton Wealth, said many people are not prepared for their parents’ health to fail.
She added: “I am seeing care for parents become a bigger financial planning issue. People are living longer, but families are not prepared for what that means.
“It means care costs, reduced working hours, emotional pressure, siblings disagreeing and adult children suddenly becoming financial administrators for parents who never shared details. The biggest pain point is that care planning usually starts in crisis.
“A parent has a fall, loses capacity, needs home adaptations or paid support, and the family is forced to make expensive decisions quickly. That is when missing Lasting Power of Attorneys (LPAs), unclear pensions, savings, property questions and inheritance tensions collide.
“Carers also pay a hidden cost. It is not just money spent, it is income lost, promotions missed, pensions affected and burnout.
“We talk about childcare far more openly than eldercare, but eldercare is becoming just as disruptive. Families need earlier conversations, LPAs, clear records and realistic care planning before the emergency happens. Now”
Poorer health in later life
Anita Wright, Chartered Financial Planner at Ribble Wealth Management, said while the population is getting older, it is also getting less healthy into old age, which is making caring an ever bigger issue.
She added: “It is worth noting that while overall UK life expectancy has edged up modestly since 2019, healthy life expectancy has fallen. The latest ONS data shows males can now expect 60.7 years in ‘good’ general health and females 60.9 years, decreases of 1.8 and 2.5 years respectively compared with 2019 to 2021.
“I work with clients whose wealth means funding care is not the central pressure point. What is striking is that financial capacity does not insulate families from the emotional and organisational dimensions of caring for an unwell parent that remains profoundly difficult, regardless of resources.”
Falling into crisis
Katrina Young, AI & Digital Transformation Strategist at KYC Digital, an AI consultancy, said she has first-hand experience of the difficulties of caring.
She added: “As someone who supported a parent through cancer treatment and witnessed ageing grandparents and elders needing increasing care, I have seen first-hand how quickly families can fall into crisis when there has been little planning, communication or transparency.
“In many families, the responsibility of care can inadvertently fall onto one child or family member, often while balancing demanding careers, children and rising living costs themselves.
“Stress and uncertainty can also sometimes lead to more domineering family dynamics, where decisions around care, finances or support are controlled by one or a small number of people rather than discussed openly.
“Too often, important decisions happen in crisis, leaving little room for proper planning or the elderly person’s own wishes and dignity. Families need earlier, more honest conversations and clearer access to support before situations become overwhelming.”
Sandwich generation
Scott Gallacher, Director at Leicester-based Rowley Turton, a financial advisory firm, said many are having to fund their kids and parents at the same time.
He added: “Today’s people in their 50s and 60s — the so-called sandwich generation — are probably under more pressure than any similar generation in recent times.
“Many are simultaneously supporting elderly parents who are living longer and increasingly needing care, while also continuing to help adult children who are struggling to get onto the property ladder or move out due to housing costs.
“People are also having children later in life, meaning many move almost directly from the pressures of work into a retirement split between caring for elderly parents and helping with grandchildren, often with little real opportunity to rest or enjoy the retirement they worked decades for to achieve.
“Financial pressures are then compounded by emotional stress, work pressures and the sheer organisational burden of trying to coordinate care, finances and family responsibilities all at once.”
Photo by David Monje on Unsplash.
